he said, she said
he said, she said
Sexual assault healing is a long journey. There are many things that, even after the majority of the healing is done, will continue to unfold. When I was sexually assaulted the first few people I told did nothing to help me, and basically implied it was my fault (they were all men, are we surprised? Unfortunately, I am not). So, when I finally did tell people who truly cared about what happened, they asked if I was going to press charges- but I had no r*pe kit, and it was about a week after. In my defeated place, I felt it was he said, she said at that point. The people who were there the night it happened didn't support me, so how could I expect them to testify in a possible court case?
I feel so much anger as I write this towards the people who chose not to help me in this situation, and left me in an even more defeated mindset than I started in. Anger that I could not protect myself. Anger towards my attacker. Anger towards the people who did not lift me up and create safe space for my healing.
May this piece bring healing and elevation to those who are going through similar situations. May this piece bring it's owner empowerment to lift themselves and others up in situations where it feels like the odds are stacked against them.